Since I was a young child, I could see and hear ghosts, spirits and angels. My parents did not support that I could experience things that they were unable to see and was told that these experiences were not real. I first would just keep these experiences to myself, and then learned to discredit them. I wanted to be normal, but I never could really fit in.
When I was 20, I was diagnosed with endometriosis. I saw all the specialists in California and had 10 surgeries in 9 years. At the age of 28 years old, I was told that I would need to have a hysterectomy. This was devastating for me as I always wanted to be a mother. I knew I had to do something different. I grew so tired of Western Medicine and how they were treating me.
I had a realization that my endometriosis was the physical manifestation of the sexual trauma of being molested as a child. I went and stayed at a holistic clinic for three months where I learned meditation, yoga, nutrition and started seeing a therapist. Within 6 months I was symptom free. Several months later I got pregnant without knowing I was pregnant.
A few weeks later I had an IUD placed without the doctor doing a pregnancy test, which would have shown I was 8 weeks pregnant. I was getting signs I was pregnant from my guides, but was continually told by the doctors I was not. At almost 20 weeks, I woke up with pain I had never known. I went to the ER to find out that I was 5 months pregnant and I was going to lose this little one. Because I was over 20 weeks along, I would have to see a specialist who was qualified to terminate this pregnancy. I could not miscarry naturally because the IUD was in the way. I was suppose to have surgery the next day however the HMO company never called me to tell me where to go. I sat around all day trying to call them without any avail. I was told in ER that I could die at anytime too because of the IUD could rupture my uterus. I felt so much despair.
After two more days of trying to get answers, I was at my breaking point. All I could do it to take one breath at a time. I would tell myself, that somehow, if I take one more breath, everything will be ok. I had been doing that for two days since I learned of my situation. But now it was too much to even take one breath at a time, even that felt overwhelming. I knew I could not continue and decided to stop breathing. In that moment of giving up, the universe offered support. Archangel Gabriel appeared in physical form to give me a message. He told me that he knew that this seemed like it was the worse thing that could ever happen to me. He told me that I was being given the most precious gift from the divine, even though in this moment I could not see it now. He told me that I was being given the gift of unlimited possibilities and abundance. He asked me to trust that I was being loved so much and I was so supported in this difficult time. He asked me not to give up yet. He left and surrounded me with the pink light of comfort and support. I was able to sleep peacefully for a short while and when I woke up I remembered his words and that gave me the strength to move forward. That morning, the HMO called me and scheduled my surgery for 4 days later. During this time, I had the surgery and felt like I had survived something huge. I felt so grateful to have made it through.
This event started me on a journey to help other people connect with their spirit guides and help people to see beyond what is seen and felt. There is this vast world beyond what most people experience which can allow for great spiritual growth, healing and learning. I want to help people connect in with that world.
‘The Gift of a Child’ by Linamarie Sojka